Bluestockings (A celebration of BUTT) Reading

The reading at Bluestockings last thursday was great. If you weren't there, you missed out. But I don't want you to completely miss out, so here's the run down. The ladies running the shop were fantastic. I made cookies (burnt the first batch, damnit!), but the second batch was gooey yum yum. Caused some major moans and groans. I hope no faking. Faking isn't good for anyone. We had a quiz with giveaways. Test question:

Who gets pleasure from the butt?

a) homosexuals

B) only men

C) snuffaluffagus

D) EVERYONE!

If you answered D and you had been there, you could have won your very own packet of viscous lube (perfect for the aforementioned butt). We had a sexpert visit and give a talk on butt play. Yes, the theme of the night was BUTT. Her breaking of taboo per-minute ratio was quite high. A dizzying kind of high. She talked about different butt massage strokes, the winking asshole (that's how you know the butt likes you and might want more), and safety tips (cut your nails!). She also very kindly brought her toys and let women climb into her strap-ons. According to her, everyone should know what it's like to have a dick. A dick is just a dick, she says.

I was very proud of those ladies who put their purses aside and climbed on in. There were quite a few. I really think the strap-on look makes the perfect facebook profile pic. You know, it's amazing how wearing a cock makes you want to fit it into things - holes in the wall, dip it in paint and draw a picture, sword fight. Cocks, oh those crazy cocks.

oh yeah, another important point our sexpert made was that having something in your butt (and liking it!) when you're a straight male doesn't make you gay. Main moral of the story: Don't be afraid of the anus!

Anyway, we are doing our next joint venture together in Philly on December 4th at Wooden Shoe Books. If you're in the neighborhood, come on by!

Vulva Interview: with Red Tulip

This is a recurring interview that the TFC blog conducts with random women. The idea is to show how varied and unique each woman's sexual experience can be. To protect the interviewee's privacy, she will be identified as her favorite flower.

TFC: Age?

RT: 29

TFC: When is the last time you looked at your vulva?

RT: Today.

TFC: What does it look like to you?

RT: An abstract form of something unique and beautiful. It's mine, and not relatable to anything I've ever laid eyes upon.

TFC: Age at first orgasm and how did you achieve it?

RT: A thumb-size, battery-operated pink vibrator gifted me my first O, a day after I turned 18.

TFC: What does an orgasm feel like to you? Do you have a definition for orgasm?

RT: Like a tense muscle that keeps tightening until it loses control, followed by a flood of tingling sensations that shoot through my body. An O, if I were to simplify it, is an unvoluntary spastic release of tension.

TFC: When was your most recent orgasm and what were the circumstances?

RT: Last night, from oral sex with my boyfriend.

TFC: Have you ever had trouble reaching orgasm? if so, how did it make you feel?

RT: Absolutely. It's maddening, and makes me feel like I fall short on a sexually cerebral level. I sometimes worry that my biggest sexual organ, my brain, doesn't work.

TFC: What did you do to overcome it?

RT: Play with myself. Alone. Again. Again, and again. I still practice today.

TFC: Have any nicknames for your vulva?

RT: Yes, but nothing that beats pussy.

TFC: What is the best piece of sex advice you've ever received?

RT: I haven't received it yet, but I'm all ears.

(TFC is always looking for more women's vulva perspectives. If you're interested in sharing yours, please send an email to info@maraaltman.com)